195. Emotional Intelligence for Dancers: Part 2 Handling Negative Emotions

195 Emotional Regulation Part 2

[00:00:00] Welcome to passion for dance. I'm your host, Dr. Chelsea, and my mission is to create happier, more successful dancers through positive mental skills training. Today is part two of a series on emotional intelligence for dancers. So if you missed part one, go back one episode and you can start there . Last time I talked about recognizing your emotions and understanding how those emotions impact you as a dancer, both in training and on stage. And since sometimes negative emotions creep in and make life hard as a dancer today, we're going to talk about real strategies you can use to help manage those negative emotions.

I hope every dancer learns to stay calm under pressure and persevere when you feel like you aren't making progress in class so that you can be the best dancer you can be. And to help you do that, I'm going to share some proactive strategies or things you can do before class and competition, or when you're just about to compete to help you stay calm under pressure.

Here's part two of emotional intelligence for dancers.

Welcome to passion for dance. I'm Dr. Chelsea, a former professional [00:01:00] dancer, turned sports psychologist. And this podcast is for everyone in the dance industry who wants to learn actionable strategies and new mindsets.

I know what it feels like to push through the pain, take on all the criticism, and do whatever it takes to make sure the show will go on. But I also know that we understand more about mental health and resilience than ever before, and it's time to change the industry for the better. This podcast is for all of us to connect, learn, and share our passion for dance with the world. 

Each of these tips is designed to help you be aware of your emotions, control them when needed, and be intentional about how you respond to those big, overwhelming emotions. Remember that emotional intelligence and management isn't about never having negative emotions. We're not trying to squash them, stuff it down, and pretend like nothing bad ever happens.

That's not realistic or healthy. Instead, it's about being more aware of how you're doing. And if you're experiencing negative emotions like anxiety or [00:02:00] sadness, choosing to respond in an intentional way that helps you better cope with those emotions. So let's start with five strategies you can use to be proactive and build that emotional resilience.

Just like you train your technique, you can train your brain and create a toolbox of mental skills that will be there for you when you need it. And that way you can perform with greater consistency and confidence, but it takes training. All of this takes time and practice. First, you can use mindfulness to build your emotional awareness.

I talked about mindfulness in detail a few episodes ago in 192, but there are lots of ways to practice being more in the moment and be aware of how you're feeling. As dancers, we always want to be in the moment when we perform and mindfulness will help you build that foundation. So you can better recognize your emotions without judgment and stay present.

Some mindfulness practices include things like a short daily meditation, either on your own or with a guided meditation app. Or it could be breathing [00:03:00] exercises to bring your awareness to your breath and slow it down if you need to. And a breathing exercise can be as simple as what I call dancer breaths because we like to count in eights, so I breathe in for six, hold for two, and a slow release for eight.

The actual counts don't matter. I just think as dancers, since we are comfortable in eights, it's nice to do it that way. Another mindfulness exercise is setting your intention for class or performance, which I discuss in episode 181, or along with that idea, using visualization. You can visualize a whole performance or even a single technical element that you're working on.

And either way, visualization is a great way to practice mindfulness and increase awareness. And setting your intention does the same thing. It's about bringing you to the present moment and directing your attention to something that will be helpful. So mindfulness is the first step to build emotional intelligence.

A second proactive strategy is to build a support system around [00:04:00] you. Having trusted people in your corner is a great way to make sure you have support when you need it later, like after you're disappointed in an outcome, when you're frustrated with yourself in class, or struggling to find the joy in dance today.

The people in your corner can be there to help you manage those negative emotions. It could be family, positive friends, or coaches and teachers. They all serve a helpful role. You can seek guidance or simply connect with people who get it. It's also great to build connections with non dancers who can provide an outside perspective or simply be there to listen and encourage you.

A third proactive strategy is to practice gratitude and self affirmations. Cultivating gratitude builds that emotional resilience by shifting your focus from your shortcomings or your current frustrations to your strengths and areas of joy. You can focus on gratitude by journaling, freestyle, just going with your thoughts or with specific prompts affirmations.

I personally love a good sticky note on my [00:05:00] mirror when I need it. It's a great reminder of what I'm getting ready in the morning. And some days you just need a little pick me up and that support can come from you. 

A fourth proactive strategy is to build emotional intelligence by simulating high pressure situations.

I think our dance industry is actually pretty good at this. That's what dress rehearsals are all about, but it's also things like going in groups in class, challenging yourself to stand in front, having a mock audition, anything that mimics the emotional intensity of an actual performance. You can also watch videos of yourself and specifically pay attention to how your emotions might be impacting your dancing.

Were you frustrated in practice today and looking back at that rehearsal video, you can see your shoulders are slumped or you're dancing really tight and rigid. Taking a few minutes to watch a video and consider your emotions and how they impacted your performance could be just as beneficial as watching for the correct choreography and execution.

It's bringing your [00:06:00] awareness back to how was I really feeling and how did that show up in my movement? 

I want to pause for just a second and say hello to any new listeners and thank you for being a part of the community. If you're new to the show today or found us recently, I have a special resource for you. It's simply the new listener resource and it has my best recommendations for other podcasts or books to inspire you.

As well as all my current free resources that you can download, which includes things like the competition confidence checklist or journal prompts that might help you today. It's actually a simple Google Doc because I'm constantly updating it and sharing new things for dancers and dance educators. And I wanted a way to give you all the links in one place.

So you can grab your copy today and it will always update as new things are happening this year. You can get it at passionfordancepodcast. com. [00:07:00] You'll see it right on the homepage. That's passion for a dance podcast. com. Welcome to the community. I'm so happy to have you. Okay. Let's get back to the show.

The fifth proactive emotional regulation strategy is to develop a pre performance routine. This is something I love doing with teams and individual dancers when we work together because it can be so powerful.

It involves a clear routine that you can always replicate wherever you are, including a warm up ritual, both a physical warmup and a mental warmup, a tool to help you focus like a specific music playlist or a positive mantra. I break down how to do this way back in episode 41. If you'd like help building your own pre performance routine.

Okay. Those five strategies will all help you build your emotional intelligence so that you have something to rely on when you need it. And I'm also not saying go out and do all these things tomorrow. I don't want to add pressure and make you more [00:08:00] stressed by talking about building emotional intelligence.

So just thinking through those five, what might be helpful? Pick one thing that you want to try. 

Let's turn to what to do when you're dancing or really standing backstage, probably. And those negative emotions are flying in when you are standing backstage, or maybe you're at the bar during an audition, or maybe trying to be seen at convention. Negative emotions can come flooding in and make it hard to dance your best. One technique that might help in the moment is to do a quick body scan. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and check in with your body. Are there any areas of tension like clenching your jaw or tight shoulders?

Intentionally release that tension so you can dance more fluidly and naturally. Another option is a grounding technique, which I talked about in the mindfulness episode, it's finding something to visually focus on to ground you in the moment. It's coming back to the present, something specific to look at. Like a water bottle or an exit [00:09:00] sign. You can also clap your hands or slap your thighs lightly. Bring your awareness to your sense of touch and your body. You can repeat statements in your head to help with your focus, like flow with the music, I've got this, or even thinking about the emotion and character you want to portray, like maybe you're in a jazz routine that has this cheeky, confident character.

So repeat that mantra, I'm cheeky, I'm confident, I'm ready. Even as I'm saying that it makes me smile, it puts you in the right emotional place and it can help you block out the unhelpful thoughts and focus on emotions and the energy you need for the routine you're about to do.

Physically and mentally grounding yourself in the moment will help you manage those negative emotions that can swoop in so you aren't distracted and prone to a mistake. And finally, channel any emotions into your performance. We are artistic athletes. As dancers, we get to use our emotions, not stuff them down.

So, let anger or sadness enhance your performance. Let it fuel your intensity in your contemporary [00:10:00] piece. And don't forget to allow the happy emotions to flood in too. Use that for your high energy musical theater piece, find a helpful interpretation of what you're feeling. Don't try to stuff it down. Notice what's happening and ground yourself in the moment. You can scan your body to release any tension, focus on the emotions and thoughts that you want to have as you take the stage.

Cause you can control that shift and guide yourself to a more helpful emotional state. And whether you're working on emotional regulation proactively before you really need it, or practicing that control backstage. These strategies can create a foundation of emotional intelligence and regulation that will benefit you throughout your career as a dancer and your life.

This is also a matter of consistency. You have to keep working on these habits so you can stay composed under pressure. You can recover after a setback and have more authentic emotional expression on stage that connects with your audience. You can even maintain a healthier relationship with dance itself [00:11:00] because with practice, these strategies make emotional regulation a natural part of your journey to excellence.

So to recap, last week, we talked about identifying your emotions, the helpful and unhelpful ones and how they impact your dancing. Today, all about those practical techniques for regulating your emotions. And that means next week, I'm going to wrap up the series with part three about those long term strategies for emotional resilience and how to recover from those intense emotions.

Emotional regulation is a skill. It builds that emotional intelligence and with practice, every dancer can harness it and shine on and off stage. I would love to connect with you and hear about a strategy that has worked for you or a question you have about the topic. You can find me at passionfordancepodcast.com/voicemail. Let me know what's on your mind. I'd love to connect. That's passionfordancepodcast.com/voicemail. Remember by using these strategies consistently, you'll build the mental skills you need to dance with confidence, poise, and [00:12:00] authenticity. Regardless of the emotions you face and the character you're supposed to portray on stage, you can balance what you need to feel your best and perform your best.

Thanks for being a part of this community and keep sharing your passion for dance with the world.

 Thank you for listening to Passion for Dance. You can find all episode resources at passionfordancepodcast. com. And be sure to follow me on Instagram for more high performance tips at doctor. chelsea. parati. That's P I E R O T T I. This podcast is for passionate dancers and dance educators who are ready to change our industry by creating happier, more successful dancers.

I'm Dr. Chelsea, and keep sharing your passion for dance with the world.